Tag: wellbeing

Posted on

Anti-fragile dad

Dads are the best. My one tops the list, obviously.

Life’s thrown him challenge after challenge after challenge. Loss of loved ones, hardship and all manner of complex situations.

Yet somehow he bounces back, time and again, stronger and stronger. With more and more love in his heart and a greater spring in his step.

Many would be fragile and collapse under the pressure of life. Others would do the mere basics to stay standing, or find ways to numb themselves from the discomfort. No, not dad — he’s anti-fragile. He takes each new challenge and becomes stronger and more vibrant.

Wherever he goes, he lights up the room and brings a feeling of joviality in the air. He works hard, travels widely and easily makes friends wherever he goes.

Recently for his 65th birthday, family and friends recorded video messages for him. The one consistent quality shared about him through these messages is his ability to bring energy to whoever he meets.

What’s for sure is that this is not by any accident. He has worked hard on himself for decades. Life throws great curveballs and yet he finds a way to consistently embrace them, get even stronger and fill the room with light.

I see this in my brother too — he is an incredible loving father to my nephew and has anti-fragility woven into every fibre of his being. Leveraging life’s knocks and bouncing back powerfully, you’ll find that wherever he goes, Sawan fills the room with light, with love and with joy.

Also my friend Leo who practices this at home and in his work, delves deep into his well of compassion to serve millions of people and even trains his community in anti-fragility.

As I look to my dad, my brother and my friends, I’m inspired to train in anti-fragility, with deep calm and great joy.

Posted on

Interfaith week community wellbeing in Harrow

Hosted by Mind (the mental health charity) in Harrow, members of various local faith groups came together on Friday 17 November to embrace mental wellbeing during Interfaith Week.

It was a relaxed and welcoming session that encouraged us to talk about what makes us happy, how the 5 Ways to Wellbeing relate to our own faith, outlook or personal philosophy, and to share our own favourite quotes and inspiring stories from our own culture.

Scientific studies have shown that happiness will increase when we follow the 5 Ways to Wellbeing: (i) Connect; (ii) Be active; (iii) Keep learning; (iv) Help others; (v) Taking notice.

I found that the session was a wonderful space for connection and a place to enjoy common ground with members of other faith groups. Discussions led to the surfacing of some great gems from the Jain faith such as “athithi devo bhava” (translates to “a guest is God”) and the cultivation of qualities such as universal friendship, appreciation of others’ virtues, compassion for the suffering and equanimity for behaviours we might otherwise struggle to deal with.

This interfaith and wellbeing coffee morning arose from a three day training course I had attended in September for Community Wellbeing Champions, again run by the Mind in Harrow Bridging Cultures project. It was such a joy to meet my fellow course mates from within the local community, continuing to strengthen bonds we had formed in the initial training course.

Keep a look out for other mental health and wellbeing events taking place in the Harrow area over the coming months. These are being run by fellow course mates who are themselves inspiring and dedicated volunteers and professionals.

A fond thank you to the team at Bru Coffee and Gelato for providing a homely space for us and to Emily Danby (Bridging Cultures Coordiator at Mind in Harrow) for organising such a wonderful coffee morning and for treating us all to a coffee!

Resources:

Posted on

Patient emerging of purpose to uplift a community

For the first decade of my life, I grew up in Wealdstone, an area of Harrow that has since significantly changed over the years. With some spare time this afternoon, I visited Wealdstone and sat on a public bench opposite the Holy Trinity Church, a building I was always intrigued by when I was a young boy.

As I sat, alone on the bench with a hot coffee in my hand, keeping my backpack close next to me, I recollected the times growing up in the area, the trip to the local bakery or the bank or the shoe shop with my mum and brother. I remembered going to the park, accompanied by my dad who taught my brother and I how to ride a bike.

As I continued to sit this afternoon, on World Mental Health Day, I observed the local community, some on their way back home from a long day at work, mothers and their children walking home from their after-school activities, others humming while cycling, or those walking while engrossed in their phone screens.

I also witnessed young men subtly exchanging what looked like small brown packets and bank notes. I noticed other young men, sipping on a can of beer concealed by a plastic bag. I saw elderly men, some sitting alone, appearing so lonely, talking to themselves. I saw other elderly men in groups, prising open a bottle of whisky and twisting open a bottle of water to dilute the whisky (thereby making the drink last that much longer).

Witnessing all this loneliness, this lack of purpose, this need to numb their pain through alcohol or drugs of some sort, made me feel very sad. In some ways, I wanted to help them out of their suffering and in other ways, I wanted to just let them be.

Looking closer, I noticed something beyond the sadness, beyond the loneliness, beyond the pain. I noticed that majestic spirit, trapped, concealed, enslaved, but still there. It was present in the everlasting beyond the transient. It came through in the way the man sitting alone tapped his legs on the paving on the ground. It showed clearly in the way the group of men engaged with each other. It was apparent through the interactions, through the gestures, through the eyes, through each breath.

It’s in that moment that I felt a sense of calm, a sense that the town I grew up in, has perhaps not degraded in the way I first thought, as it still houses the very spirit that has the potential to uplift the entire community. In that moment, I witnessed hope, joy, wisdom and a sense of purpose, eagerly seeking to emerge.